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“Who better to be a champion for you than you?”

Have you ever been passed up for a promotion at work? Or had a less-than-desirable experience with family? Or not had your needs met by your partner? Advocating for yourself can be an intimidating process; however, if you follow the four steps below, you’ll be able to state what you want and need from others.

Step 1: Know what you want and what you need. “People often think that they want a certain position at work or for their partner to do something specific for them. However, they don’t take the time to self-assess and determine if they REALLY want that thing or they just want it because they see everybody else getting it, or it seems like the next logical step,” says Darryl Lovett, Co-Creator of Success in Black and White. Take the time to self-assess, determine your strengths, know what type of work environments you prefer, understand how you want your partnership to look. When you know what you actually want, you’ll know what to advocate for.

Step 2: Advocate for yourself non-verbally. “In short, show up,” says Darryl. “Show up for work, show up for your relationship. Be on time, be consistent, and perform at your best. Do the hard work to make those elements of your life the best they can be. Bring your best self to your work and personal relationships,” He says. “When you show up non-verbally, you are actually advocating for yourself without having to say the words.

Step 3: Know your stuff. “This is especially true at work,” says April Lovett, Co-Creator of Success in Black and White. “If there is a position or a project you’re gunning for, be as knowledgeable as possible about it. If you don’t have the experiential knowledge, grab all the resources you can and get to work on expanding your knowledge,” she says. “This will position you to go in and advocate for that position or that project you want.”

Step 4: Have a plan. “Whenever you are ready for the big moment of advocacy, make sure you have a plan,” says Darryl. “I advocated for a promotion at work once, and when I went in to make the request, I got hit with questions I couldn’t answer like what was my vision for the position? And, how would I help the employees transition under my leadership?” he recalls. “Unfortunately, my lack of preparation means I did not get that job.”

Want more of this conversation? Tune in to the episode of the podcast below to hear Darryl & April’s conversation "Level Up Your Confidence Game".

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